Tuesday, August 12, 2008

It begins early

At 23 weeks I develop this increasing cramping pain and go in to see the doctor. They do a cervix scan and tell me my cervix has shortened quite a bit since a week and half ago and want to see me again in two days. I was told if it was shorter I would be hospitalized so might as well bring a bag with me. I was crushed because my baby shower was the weekend and I just knew I would be going into the hospital. Sure enough Thursday comes and it shortened. I just cried and cried but I knew this would be happening, but I wanted to wait until I was further along. My babies are not ready to come out yet.

I've been in the hospital for almost a week now. The doctors are going to re-evaluate me and tell me my fate this week. I'm planning on staying in the hospital because I have this gut feeling the twins will be born before the end of the month. I pray they stay in for a long time, but I just know that isn't the case. My mom keeps telling me to stop saying that and I should have a positive attitude. I do, that is the thing. I just know that's all... I got steroid shots so they should help.

We are preparing ourselves for a long NICU stay. It will be so hard leaving my babies in the hospital when I am discharged. I just can't believe it's coming so soon. This year has been one hell of a roller coaster.

2 comments:

Sara said...

Wow. I had read a bit from you on WebMd, but just got finished reading your blog. Thank you for sharing - your emotions come through your writing and brings tears to my eyes.

nancy said...
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